Fast Trucks Friday: Pickups feel the need, the need for speed

Do you ever get tired of feeling like Goose – the dull, responsible, hard working guy – and wish you were Maverick? (Just not in the ’80s.)

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The staff here at Fun Trucks Friday can empathize. Our trucks are utilitarian, and if we’ve modified them at all, those changes are to improve their utility or at least their looks (which have a certain utility, of course, in maintaining one’s self-image).

Maybe it’s global warming, but the FTF desk has recently been swarmed with reports of the fastest pickup EVER! We’ll let you, dear reader, decide which of these suits your fancy.

Let’s start with a bang: Baja, bikini babes and Ballistic BJ Baldwin – what could go wrong when his 800hp Trophy Truck is “Unleashed in Ensenda”? (Be advised: If you’re wearing headphones, turn the volume down.)

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If you’re the more subtle type, the 2011 Ford Ranger RABID COYOTE EDITION Sport might be more your speed. And when we say ‘speed,’ this mild-mannered looking pickup can produce. Florida upfitter Blow by Racing replaced the stock V-6 with a Coyote 5.0-liter V-8 engine and a six-speed manual gearbox. By the time it made it to Highline Motors South, in Fort Mill, S.C., recently, the Ranger still had only 900 miles on it, driven only by a little old lady going back and forth to custom truck shows.

But sorry, it just sold for about $27,000, or roughly the MSRP – so that’s $20,000+ in free upgrades.


Naturally, if you really want speed from your pickup, you’re going to put in a bigger motor. And, unnaturally, the place with the most space for a really big engine, like a 580 cubic-inch Chevy with 76mm turbos, is the truck bed. For those occasions when you feel the need to turn a 10-second quarter-mile at 140mph or so.

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Finally, Australian upfitter HSV earned a Guinness World Record in 2006 when its Holden Commodore ute variant, the Maloo R8, topped out at 167mph and bested the previous record of 155mph by a Dodge SRT-10.

But now HSV is eyeing a new model, the Maloo GTS, reported to be fitted out with 6.2-liter supercharged V-8 capable of 580hp. The HSV sedan model has hit 174mph, according to CarsGuide. Pitcures below is the 2013 Maloo R8.

(And, yes, we did have to get in something El Camino-related.)

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